God's Kitchen

It is way past midnight (oh yes, my BEDTIME too!) and I’m still wide awake. The reddish grey cloud outside is already hinting that rain is inevitable while the accompanying cool breeze is saying amen to that! Lovely…

I can’t help myself from munching the hot potato PIK-NIK “Shoestrings” while writing this…it is so addictive I’m beginning to think that if I don’t stop now I’ll continue eating it like an Eat-To-Sleep Chewing Machine! Oh don’t worry, I don’t do that all the time…and my current weight is still bearable…so it’s okay…

By the way, there’s a SMALL bowl of Cruzer’s Daybreak Salad waiting for me in the kitchen!

Hmmm…anyway, I’m just thinking…

If again tomorrow night I can’t sleep, despite the perfect weather, will I drug myself with more junk food or will I turn to the solid spiritual food? Shhh…I know…

Yes; lately, I’ve been so challenged and healthily bugged by the word of God written in Joshua 1:8. It says…

“Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful”. (NIV)

You see…too many of us, me included, I’m pretty sure we’ve came across this scripture too many times we overlooked the lamb-chop-like juice of truth it contains. Often time I realize I’d focus more on the “God’s Promise” part of the scripture neglecting the “My Action” part. It is as though I was too hungry I couldn’t wait for my lamb chop to cook I ate it raw – far off from His plan for me to enjoy the meat well done.

The thing about me (and probably you too) is that I don’t really love waiting and I want what I want right here right now. That’s how I am sometimes. I wanna be prosperous and I wanna be successful and I want them both fast, minus having to go through any hurdles. It is like I’m demanding for the profit but totally choose to forget about the investments! It doesn’t work that way, right?

But God being the fair Boss, His strategy is different – always! Not that He loves to withhold His promises, but in my own opinion, He is just not a fan of having to fork out salary advances to any of His servants. Unless faith actions are constantly and sincerely shown, He can choose to delay in delivering the desires of my heart…and He will not surprisingly do just that!

The whole experience of being enlightened by this simple verse has really caused me to dig in whatever I read so much deeper with the quest to find a fresh revelation and the whole package that comes with it. Like those who serves in the oil and gas industry, they dig deeper not with the goal to find out more about dinosaurs or fossils they knew ever existed; their prize – the oil and gas itself! Likewise, my attitude is not to just read whatever that is visible but beyond.

That’s just one of the things I learned…would love to share more juice with you again next time…perhaps in one of my other sleepless nights. Til then, enjoy what I’m leaving behind for you…

Cruzer’s Daybreak Salad Recipe:

Chicken Sausages with Cheese and Chili – raw, sliced to your hotness;

Onions, sliced thin enough to remind you of the unnecessary fat you might gain;

Tomato, sliced to the number of hours you have left in bed;

Carrots, sliced enough to shut your Parrot mouth;

Coral Leaves/Lettuces, generously green enough to remind you Jude is a vegetarian;

Sprinkles of coarse Black Pepper, as desired as you would tiny sweet moles on your face;

French Dressing, poured to perfection to romance your taste bud.

*would be nicer with Parmesan Cheese & Croutons!

Best paired with: Iced Lemon Tea chilled at -2°c.

Total Preparation Time: 7 minutes

Accompanying Soundtracks:

Nightminds by Missy Higgins

Water Feels Warm by Electralow

Hide Me by Grandad Bob

Sound of Silence

I don't really have a title watsoeva but this is basically wat i went thru d last 2 weeks o so...d 1st is me, d 2nd part is when God came into d picture...



Engulfed by total silence I didn't know what to say…

Jotting my thoughts down on paper was totally outta the question…

As though it's gonna help translate what's exactly been piling up in the core of my dented heart...

If it could be a color, pitch black would have well painted my disturbed mind…

Saving precious words for deep conversations seemed to be a valid excuse for the prolonged silence...

The silence I befriended and grew fond of…

Who would have thought the lowest decibel could be far greater in volume than the sound of a roaring thunder?

Unexpected occurrence…you left me baffled…

Silence…

Uninvited yet persistently it came, breaking the silence…

As though written in the air I heard every word whispered…

Tearing the separating veil this gentle voice reached for my reshaped heart…

A tone so calm coated in shades of the bluest deep ocean…

Words of comfort and hope it bestowed upon me without restraint…

None of which came cheap but I got 'em for free…

So real were they silence was kept at bay, waiting to just fade away…

Who would have thought silence could effortlessly be erased simply by letting the voice speak?

Predictably unusual…I'm mystified…

You broke the ice…

Cuz1am

2009?

I can't believe 2008 is gone. Neither am I aware that today is actually the 15th day of 2009! To be honest, I don't even think my new year have begun...I'm still in my holiday mood!

At this point of writing, my dry throat feels like it's gonna tear really soon. It hurts so bad I wanna shove a bucket of ice cream right now...but I can only dream on as it is fasting season now for us here in our church.

I am also feeling a bit tired after making a short but exciting trip to Singapore & Indonesia last weekend together with my drumming family from Drummer For Christ. It was indeed a fun trip for me as I had the opportunity to drum together with this crazy bunch of guys who happens to be the world's finest drummers:

Arthur Kam (winner of Modern Drummer Undiscovered Talent under-18 category for 2008);

Rolf Wam Fjell (Hillsong Australia's very own drumming monster);

Lim Kok Yen (Malaysia's famous drum guru);

Vince Seah (Founder of Drummer For Christ Malaysia);

Derrick Siow (Malaysia's very own Aaron Spears);

Josh Wong (probably one of the good Jazz drummers/bassists in Malaysia).

Travelling with these guys has not only benefitted me in terms of my skills and everything else that has got to do with it but God also have given me the confidence to release words to some of the members of the team…something which I'd reluctantly do not too long ago. Though simple or nothing to brag about, the fact that I was able to confidently speak into their lives has boosted me to avail myself to be a voice that God would use to encourage others even more.

Back track a little bit…Christmas Production – The Heavenly Gift…I truly had fun playing Val, a nerdy angel with a thousand and one and a half questions! It never crossed my mind that I could play that role but I surprised myself & the show went well…

Next week we'll be hitting the studio again to record 1am's 5^th (my 2^nd) album which should be out, if everything goes as planned, in May or June. It's gonna be a great album. Hmmm…but we pray that it'll be more than just a great record…we want it to be a conduit of the defining moment in the lives of its listeners!

My throat is really uncooperative now…please join me in prayers for its complete healing. It's a bit annoying now I feel I better stop writing here. Will give you guys a buzz again real soon. My head's spinning too! Be blessed…

Cuz1am

2008 Briefly - Cuzario

Looking back, 2008 was like a roller-coaster ride for me personally.
There were lotsa ups and downs almost everywhere all the time.

Compared to the year before, there weren't many tours in 2008 but itdoesn't mean we didn't do much this year. What I personally perceive is that God kept us for a season just to prepare us for a greater year ahead.

Through this time of confinement God truly have brought us as a band to really dive in deeper into the ocean floor, understanding a new level of what worship is all about. Finding new revelations about how great God really is was almost like having an incurable brain tumor! Even mind-boggling doesn't come close to describing the magnitude of this God we are serving!

Generally, especially in the 2nd half of the year, we enjoyed our time ministering, empowering, equipping & training a few worship teams from some local churches around the country. Besides, we also prioritized to strengthen our own worship teams at home.

Personally, it was and still is a very emotionally-challenging year for me as relationships with friends turned rocky and all that. Worst, I had to fight with time as God welcomed some (in the last 2 years) of my dearest home to be with Him forever a bit sooner than I
could imagine.

In my brokenness facing the reality of life I'm thankful that God is still so ever faithful in having so much interest in every area of my imperfect life. I cannot but keep thirsting for more of Him each day. It's His grace that fuels me to lift my heavy feet as I drag my own cross daily knowing that in my weaknesses I'm always made strong. More than often His comforting living Words has never failed to keep me sane and grounded each time unexpected storms came by, which in some desperate moments made me feel as though I'm clinging for my dear life on a sinking boat only to realize He's always there to grab me from sinking deeper into the troubled waters.

Overall, the journey this year wasn't easy at all but definitely rewarding. Surrendering everything to Him is still the best choice and the right thing todo. As I lay here waiting for a better tomorrow, all He's asking me to do is to be still and let God be God! So...I'll just stick to that in obedience. After all, He's the One who's in control over this broken
life.


~cruzer~